Kinship One Minute Guides

For Special Guardians

Purpose: To support Special Guardians in making contact with birth parents safe, child-centred and manageable while maintaining healthy long-term relationships.

Keep the child’s needs first

• Focus on what the child can cope with emotionally and practically.
• Prepare the child before contact by explaining who they will see, where, when and what to expect.
• After contact, check in gently and note any changes in behaviour or mood.

Follow the agreed contact plan

• Follow the contact arrangements set out in the court order or support plan.
• Avoid changing times or locations unless agreed with the social worker.
• Do not promise additional contact to parents or the child without discussion.

Practical contact tips

• Choose neutral, public and consistent locations for contact.
• Keep communication predictable, with clear times and clear endings.
• Bring activities to help ease anxiety.
• Avoid sharing personal details unless it is safe to do so.

Safeguarding considerations

• Be alert to intoxication, agitation or inappropriate behaviour.
• Watch for secrecy requests, pressure on the child or discussions about court matters.
• End contact early if safety is compromised.
• Keep factual records of what happened.

Managing relationships with birth parents

• Be calm, respectful and clear about boundaries.
• Use neutral language.
• Avoid being drawn into conflict.
• Respond consistently and refer back to the contact plan.

Looking after yourself

• Contact can be emotionally draining, so seek support when needed.
• Remember that Health Assured offers confidential health and wellbeing support, including help with personal or work-related concerns.
• You can also access support through the CCC Peer Mentor Scheme, Coventry Peer Support Network and the Kinship charity.
• Ask for the contact plan to be reviewed if difficulties continue.